How does one start to tell a story? Oh, I know. There is the beginning, the middle and of course the ending.
As a child I recall wishing I had never been born. That was a constant between God and me. Why did he put me on this beautiful earth, to be unwanted by my mother and placed in such dire circumstances?
A childhood of abandonment by my biological mother, I was raised by a much older aunt and uncle. Abuse, isolation, alcoholism, and extreme poverty were only worsened by the cruelty of small town people gossiping and judging us.
So, I prayed to a God I didn’t really know, didn’t truly understand, but somehow my childish spirit knew God was all I had...and I could always talk with Him. Anytime, day or night, He always listened.
As I said, I was raised in a rural farming community..............so I spent most of my life alone. The nearest house was a mile and half or so away. Raised in Kansas , the land of Oz. How I so believed in the yellow brick road and where it would take me one day.
An acquaintance from my church recently asked me, how did I think I got through the difficulties at such a young age? All I could reply was “GOD,” He got me through it all, even though I didn’t always feel Him and even at times thought He had forgotten about me. He was my Light. I had a small black teddy bear that I would talk to about all my troubles and how someday, though I had no idea how, things would just be better.
This is how my life started out..............there is more to tell, much more as with everyone born into this world. Since becoming a Christian I have learned just how much God WAS in my life through those early years. Each and every element of my life was planned before creation. I was a child of God and He had and still has plans for me. He has never left or forsaken me and He never will.
He is placing it upon my heart to share my life as a way to reach others that have gone through similar circumstances, so that they may know they are not alone. That when family and friends abandon you, there is One who is steadfast and true. He never lies to you, He never loses faith in you and He loves with a love that at times is overwhelming. His grace has been such a force throughout my life. It can be for you also.
Psalm 27:5
For in the day of trouble
He will keep me safe in his dwelling;
He will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock. (NIV)
Copyright © March, 2007 – Emily Schwefferman. All rights reserved.
